bumming

i really appreciate the time that i have right now, just to sit around and do nothing except BUM around.
and it's especially nice to slouch on the couch by the window with loved ones, watching the rain pitter patter outside, and feeling safe and comfy and cozy in the enclosed air-conditioned room.
which is pretty much what we did the whole day. we literally glued our butts to the couch.
and when we finally decided to unglue ourselves, we decided to head to railway mall to get FOOD!!
so we pretty much bummed around, and ate, and grew fat. very chalet-ish.
this was taken in the lift mirror..

HEE~

we managed to catch the Sarah Hopkin's Harmonic Whirlies at the esplanade ytd too! (:
an interesting original style of celestial music, which was all very.. zen.


this is her, fusing overtone singing and spiritual cello playing



and these are the harmonic whirlies! haha.
(whereby swinging the rubber-tubeys at diff frequencies create diff pitches of sound)


and this is mac with a handbell! haha. which she included as part of her performance.

all in all, a very interesting performance (:
after a fun shopping day with baby chong!! haha.

heres a random pic of my lovabubba =p


her first time on the dining table, with her fair share of my sister's mango bday cake (:
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

ok im watching world cup now.
and i rly dont get anything -.-
like why the clock is still ticking after 90min when the game is sposed to b 90 min?!

life's lyrics

"Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me,
for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." - Matt 11:29-30










i miss you gurl!! :(



an overwhelming inception of emotions
eating at me, chewing at my heart

my first time doing back to back movies
a funny rosy comedy cum chick flick She's the MAN!, and then the dark satanic show The OMEN.
im still recovering from the after-effects.
we met joshua! haha who slimmed down a LOT.
and i satisfied my wanton-mee and caesar salad craving FINALLY.
ive been wolfing down foods and lots of foods ever since i got well (:
which shows im now in the PINK of health haha.

a scent. one whiff.
and it all came back
but im pushing it all away
because reality's so much sweeter (:

today!! :))

its a happy day, and i thank God for the weather
it's a happy day, and i'm living it for my God
it's a happy day, and things are gonna get better
living each day in the promises in God's words! '

You are


"One rainy afternoon I was driving along one of the main streets of town,
taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick.

Suddenly, my daughter, Aspen, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat.
"Dad, I'm thinking of something."

This announcement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while,
and was now ready to expound all that her six-year-old mind had discovered.
I was eager to hear.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

"The rain!" she began, "is like sin,
and the windshield wipers are like God wiping our sins away."

After the chill bumps raced up my arms I was able to respond.
"That's really good, Aspen."

Then my curiosity broke in. How far would this little girl take this revelation?
So I asked... "Do you notice how the rain keeps on coming?
What does that tell you?"

Aspen didn't hesitate one moment with her answer:
"We keep on sinning, and God just keeps on forgiving us."


[[In order to see the rainbow, you must first endure some rain ]]



hehe. and congrats to all who are gonna POP later in the day (:

shopping!

finally. the sweet bliss of the GSS! (:





about 6 hours of shopping with mom and sis.
it was pretty pretty good! we got quite alotta stuff without spending too much $$
(though i still have alotta things in mind)
hehe~ but nvm thats what the china trip is gonna be for!! HEE~ shopping!!

ok monday teevee night! byee~

two more days

im glad i got well enough to say byebye.
thankfully it wasnt an emotional farewell
but im rly gonna miss you gurl :(
all that crazy shit we did together, and the talks we had,
how we cried together, and laughed together..
but "friends are friends forever" right?
so now we juz have to holler a little louder, with you all the way down south!
so heres a little shoutout with a preetee lil daisy for you
and a take care and a we LOVE you!! (:

im starting to get my voice back bit by bit.
there's a thin line btwn a sexy husky voice, and a hoarse manly voice
and right now i cant decide which side of the line im on
but it sure beats having people to lip-read whatever im saying, or trying to act it out, or scrambling for my phone to text out stuff like "haha i think that is lame"
nothing beats being able to voice out your thots.

so, us churchies today had worship and service and the breakthrough missions.
which was a pretty new experience for prolly all of us in a very interesting way.
we had service in a mini chapel compound that was rly like those mini churches in olden days villages.
then we sang chinese worship songs that we've never even heard before, in a rather.. retro style.
there were testimonies by previous drug addicts on how their lives were changed thru knowing Christ
and then it made alotta us redefine the meaning of "living hell" and appreciate what we have even more.
and then it reignited something in me that i havent felt in a long long time
which makes me rly wanna go out there, and scream to everyone who hears me GOD LOVES YOU!


We want to run to the altar
and catch the fire
to stand in the gap
between the living and the dead
Give us a heart of compassion
for the world without vision
we will make a difference
bringing hope to our land

where'd you go

im feeling majorly frustrated and uber pissed.

no point complaining and whining about it. much good it'll do.
i feel myself brimming with energy and liveliness, but yet stuck in myself, coughing my lungs out, with a perpetual headache that wont go away, and worst of all - i lost my voice.

im so sorry to all whom ive canceled plans with. or whom im gonna cancel plans with.
it really sucks but theres nothing i can do since i dont know sign language.
it's like dangling a piece of freshly done smoked salmon in front of a starving kitten just slightly out of its reach,
or like running out of coins when you reach a drink station after a 10k run and theres no other ways of quenching ur thirst.

it sucks to be sick.
because i know the only cure is to sit and wait.
and also because i know this is the last 2 days we can actually have plans like these.

self-worth

definition: the quality of being worthy of esteem or respect

in a way, everyone is in pursuit of self-worth in whatever they do.
to attain that sense of dignity and pride for self, and respect from others.
people are empowered by self-worth, because only then do they feel that they are valuable to themselves and others.
i use to think self-worth could be attained by what you achieved, or what you had.
or maybe even what you portray yourself to be, like what you wore, what you said, and what you did.

but really, self-worth doesnt come that simply.

as i was pondering about the issue of self-worth, i concluded that it depended on a few factors.
firstly, the achievements that brought about the glory and pride, the results that speak of your talents and hard work and commitment. this, grants you respect and esteem on a basic superficial level.
secondly, emotional support from the people around you. because only when the people who matter to you show and treat you with respect and with dignity, will you be able to establish a sense of self-worth.

similarly, failures that speak of your incapacity and weaknesses may trigger a sense of disappointment, and prolonged disappointment may lead to a feeling of worthlessness. the value in you seems to decrease by a few notches because you fail to meet expectations.
coincidentally interlinked to that, the disappointment from others around you would lead to a lack of self-worth, because you feel as though you have let them down again and again, even when you're trying really hard not to. which really sucks.

and after all that baloney that i've just rapidly typed out above,
it led me to think of how great God's love is, for He loves us even when we do the most worthless value-less things. or rather, when we fail to do things that are worthy of love and respect.

this entry has no conclusion. because i dont have one.
maybe "if at first you dont succeed, try, try again".
or maybe, "i'm gonna try to stop failing"
or maybe, just "God loves you no matter what" (:
argh. or all of the above.

sick

im S-I-C-K. again.
and so i had to skip sentosa (again, again) with celine,
and also waffles tuesday!! (again, again, again)
owell.



on the brrigghhtt sunny side, i got a new blog template (:
created by yours truly! -beams-
of course, with the expert and professional help of our very own - ONG NE.
thankew thankew thankew! (:
for your patience and tolerance for this HTML illiterate.

i also got a new haircut.
my mom and i decided to give jantzen a shot.. and it wasnt too bad i guess.
except my bangs are rly heavily layered now. the stylist was pretty much slicing thru my hair.
so i pretty much look like a jap now o_0

but other than that, ive pretty much done nothing except lay around, nursing my throbbing head, and my imminent threatening cough.
so in honor of that, i shall award myself another cute smiley -
cuz smileys make everyone all smiley HEE~~

days of our lives

in order of chronlogical appearance..

friday..

the display of adorable elegance.. on the car handrest.


and its owner..

saturday..

boy and girl? or girl and girl?? haha =p


sunday morning..
heres a demonstration of how a keyboard score-holder can be used.
example 1) used as feelers for tinkerbell!


example 2) used as a murder weapon!


sunday fundaes! (: "its a happy day.."
an intended trip to sentosa was ruined no thanks to the rain.
and was replaced by.. a jamming session!!



our new praise team band (:
hahaha YEAH RIGHT.
a picturesque shot of us with instruments we canNOt play. haha.
faith is about conquering self isnt it? wahaha.



sunday evening..
i finally got my tiramisu from TCC.
and celine got her strawberry shortcake.
and this is us happy satisfied people (:
or rather, just the happy girls. haha.

a new day

theres this nagging feeling inside me which refuses to go away.
it's getting rather worrisome, cuz altho i ignore it, its constantly there.
and its making me feel all sentimental, maudlin - EMO.
so while im trying rly hard to close my zipper on these emotions
my emo-bagpack just feels as if its ready to burst right open
and spill out its content for everybody to see.

no, it has nothing to do with the fan-TAS-tic banana split i juz had.
home-made banana split, nicely squashed into a cartoon bowl
it was passed around the couch in delight
leaving little or none for my poor mama
who made it in the first place OOPS.

and no, it has nothing to do with the awesome day i had
at the Defence Technology Intl Conference
haha makes us sound so big and important
but we were actually juz the reception staff =p
ticking names off some looonnngg list and finding cool ID tags for the people who were the owner of the names so that they can attend the conference in peace
haha it was loads of fun, all tt foreign french indian pakistani++ names popping up.
and also cuz i spent 95.9999% of the time catching up with seokkk!
and we both got 40 bucks each of CASH juz for doing that (:
plus an awesome lineup of desert -drools- like tiramisu, pastries, & more cakes.
PLUS lunch PLUS impt pple (who made us feel impt too)
so it was pretty worth it!
we got our own ID tags, complete with our pictures on it
(altho my pic was squashed up to fit the small corner so my face looks damn FAT)



but it was an experience (:

so after blurting out all those nonsensical voyeuristic info above
catharsis has done its trick again - i feel better already.
the rest of the days have been spent bumming around, literally.
because i have been on my bumm all day long ever since i got retrenched.
catching up wit friends, gorging myself wit food, and TEEVEE!!
recipe for a couch potato. and soon to be, fatass. (yes, literally)
my tug-of-war with weekends brings me closer to victory with each day tt passes
(imissyouimissyouimissyouimissyouimissyou!)
but also one day closer to saying byebye to my beloved sista
-cries buckets-

owell.
but as the song goes
"it's a happy day
and things are gonna get better
living each day in the promises of God's words!"

so, no one's gonna cry buckets. (for now)